Monday, May 31, 2010

Week #3

Week #3 is called NOT THE ONE. Well, duh, it's three, not one, I mean, really... Being the one and/or not being the one is obviously very subjective. Or not. Ask Frodo or Neo, they're the experts. And only 70% of them is gay. Max. I'm pretty sure I AM the one who is writing this, because both of my hands are keyboard-tied and so I can't scratch my butt, therefore I have passed the test with flying col... uh, I mean supererogatorily. Nice. Also the quotes will be about writing. Because there are no respectable songs about writing (from this century anyway) and there is not enough smart words about not being the one. And I sure as hell ain't gonna be the one to write them. Why?! Well... guess what - I AM NOT THE GODDAMN ONE!

We begin the week with oh-will-you-stop-with-all-that-damn-happiness Trumpet Monday.
The song is "I'm not the one you love" by the American funk band The Scabs. This shows you how pure awesomenes can have less than 1000 views on Youtube, while all the emo crap gets millions. Pa-the-tic-tic-boom!

"Popularity is the one insult I have never suffered." - Oscar Wilde

Sunday, May 30, 2010


Last call! For coffee, you dirty drunk you! Super-extra-mega-giga-tera treat this Hangovery Randomness Sunday! Three, yes, 3 songs! Oh my Jeebus! O-M-J!!!!!!11eleventyone

"I'm going to stop putting things off, starting tomorrow!" - Sam Levenson

First one is "Tomorrow" by the American hard rock band Sixx:A.M. from the album (awesome, awesome album) The Heroin Diaries Soundtrack.

Then comes "Maybe Tomorrow Is A Better Day" by the Finnish rock band Poets Of The Fall from the album Signs of Life. THE best album recorded in the first decade of 21st century. Period. No discussion. Well, maybe later.

And finally: "Tomorrow I Won't Remember" by the English industrial rock band esOterica.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

No Title for the Wicked

What is more epic than being epic? Well, being epopoeic, of course! And there's nothing more epopoeic than Epopoeic Saturday. Epopoeic, epopoeic, epopoeic!

The song is "Eyes of Tomorrow" by the American ambient rock band Broken Iris. These guys are so underground that they even don't have a Wikipedia page! How gauche! Nevertheless, their debut 2007 album (the only one so far) "The Eyes of Tomorrow" is what Tool would sound like if they grew a few pairs of balls. Aaaw-some! Plus, I've found out that somehow everybody forgot to mention that Tim Burton did an animated film which looks cool-as-hell and (thank-you-jeebus) there ain't no singing involved.

"Today a reader, tomorrow a leader." - Margaret Fuller

Friday, May 28, 2010

Long Hair Friday

Thank you, unemployed hairdressers of the World - it's Long Hair Friday once again!
The song is "Truth of Tomorrow" by the Swedish synth rock/power metal band Machinae Supremacy. Awesome grim-future lyrics. Check it out:

Now I'm waiting to be ceased and turned in to a brand
The chip beneath my skin, ready to be scanned
Am I merely a supply meeting some demand?
Is this a lullaby in someone's masterplan?
Which reminds me of Alice-who-the-fuck-is-alice-I'm-Milla-you-cunt from Resident Evil. Well, she's the hottest zombie exterminator ever. And also sings. What? OK, extra bonus from Milla. Teeheehee!

"Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone." - Pablo Picasso


Thursday, May 27, 2010

E.T. Fili Brute?!

All hail Electrocuted Thursday! Interesting shit today. The song is "There's no tomorrow" by the Dutch dark wave/goth rock (whatever that means) band Clan of Xymox. The awesomely awesome part is that the video is actually shots from the Italian horror film Dellamorte Dellamore. Which is about Dylan Dog, the awesomest comic-book hero everrr! Plus, these Dutch guys sound like Depeche Mode would, if they weren't so dedicated to being boring.

"Good executives never put off until tomorrow what they can get someone else to do today." - John C. Maxwell

Wednesday, May 26, 2010


What is better than hearing a bitch scream? Well, not many things. Including beer-flavored ice-cream.

This week in the almighty Screaming Bitch Wednesday we have a little too mainstreamish song. What can you do? It's "Tomorrow" by the Canadian pop-rock singer... you know who it is... yes, it's Avril Lavigne. Oh, boy. Shut up. This live act is pure awesomeness. I mean, she cries while singing. Respect. Now go record Rollerblade Boy or whatever.

"Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree." - Martin Luther

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

PC's In Da House! PC! PC!

Pass The Tissues Tuesday features a song "Tomorrow I'll Be You" by the American post-hardcore (good thing once upon a time there was hardcore. Otherwise we wouldn't have this beautiful genre. Time breaks in two: BH - before hardcore, and PC - post hardcore. Because hardcore did way cooler stuff than Jeebus.) band Thursday. Not listening to this band's album War All The Time is an gargantuan mistake. Titanical. It's in my top-10-albums-of-all-time list. Pure WIN! Even though they're clearly emo. Good thing I bought ridiculous amount of tissues.

"I have never met a vampire personally, but I don't know what might happen tomorrow." - Bela Lugosi

Monday, May 24, 2010

Holy Crap It's Monday Again!


I'll listen to some awesome songs touching that over-touched theme of the-day-after-today. While I hammer down the last parts of my ├╝ber-supra-cool time machine in my imaginary basement.

The traditional Trumpet Monday begins with "They Provide the Paint" by the American ska-punk band Streetlight Manifesto. They obviously have a lot to say. Like: "Yada-yada-yada and tomorrow it'll end..." Me like. Awesome and fun and sad lyrics. Plus the obligatory trumpets.

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia." - Charles M. Schulz

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Hangovery Randomness Sunday

Time to wrap up the week. With nothing less than "Hangovery Randomness Sunday". I believe the name speaks for itself. Actually, I'm not hung over. Just hung. Well hung.

The song is "Colorblind" by the American pop-punk/emo (I swear they're just making that shit up on a daily basis) band Say Anything. I move too slow and I think too fast and the first rainbow I see will be the last! Nice! That's it, the first music week ever is over. End of the rainbow. It was awesome.

"After fifteen minutes nobody looks at a rainbow" - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

OK, no, wait! Sunday is free-time day. I'll squeeze in one more awesome song! "Rainbow" by the Italian pop-rock performer Elisa. Sweet! Pop music is also music. Well, almost.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Epopoeic Saturday

Enter "Epopoeic Saturday"! It's more epic than the epicness itself!
And the virgin song is: "Silhouette Paintings" by American hard rock band Kingdom Come. It's so epopoeic it doesn't even come with a video. They couldn't record one that was worth the epopoeicness of this song. It would've been sheer epopoeiclessness.

"Weekends are a bit like rainbows; they look good from a distance but disappear when you get up close to them." - John Shirley

Friday, May 21, 2010

Long Hair Friday

All hail "Long Hair Friday"! Yes, this is the metal day of the week. Unfortunately for the hormonally-crazed, long-haired head-bangers (hyphens rule!), I've chosen a ballad. Up yours? Up your iron? Something like that.

We're listening to "Master Of The Wind" by the American power metal band Manowar. Now, I think they are just too ridiculous to be considered real music, but they did manage to create one (and only one) superb song in their career. And here it is. Live. So we can all enjoy their Pityriasis-simplex-capillitii-free hairs. That's dandruff-free for all you Latinically challanged.
"We live in a rainbow of chaos." - Paul Cezanne

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Electrocuted Thursday

Today is "Electrocuted Thursday". The first of... one? OK, maybe more. Or not. Depends on the number of sodomy threats I receive.

The song is "Rise Up" by Yves LaRock - a Swiss DJ. Pure awesomeness. It presents fucking jump rope as something supra-cool and not a game for little girls. You can NOT be smiling when they bounce on their asses. Fun. Awesome. Watch it.

"Life's not always fair. Sometimes you can get a splinter even sliding down a rainbow." - Terri Guillemets

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Day 3

OK, girls are allowed one day of the week. But no more. So, behold... wait for it ..."Screaming Bitch Wednesday"! Hmmm, I wonder what could that be?!

Today's song is "Nazi Halo" by the American punk rock (read "riot grrrl") band Jack Off Jill. She seems angry. And swears a lot. Which makes this a bazillion times better than Beyonce's "Halo". Which is... (checks Wikipedia ) ...yes, a song with the most retarded lyrics ever written. Hmm, always thought that was "El Condor Pasa" by Simon And Garfunkel. I mean, come on! "I'd rather be a sparrow than a snail?" Snails are homeowners, plus they are hermaphrodites. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Then, more crap: "I'd rather be a hammer than a nail." Wrong. I like getting hammered, not being one. And if being a nail means I'll be doing more nailing - well, sign me up. Nails are awesome. I mean, let's say you were thinking of killing a deity. Let's call this random deity "Geebus". What tools and/or devices would you use? A hammer? Wrong! Only nails work on deities. Just like wooden stakes (notice the similarity to the nails) work on vampires. (-cough-) Right, so listen to this shit, not Paul "Dr. Do-little" Simon. Damn snailhater.

"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." - Dolly Parton

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Pass The Tissues Tuesday

Now, let me introduce to you... (-drum roll-) ..."Pass The Tissues Tuesday"! Yes! Emoism is da main shit now! Smiling and feeling good is for losers! Like me, who can't finish the sentence without the exclamation mark! (-sob-)

Today's song is "Chasing Rainbows" by the English alternative rock (read "Brit Emo") band Shed Seven. So, yeah, today is OK to cry, even if you're not a little girl. Which is so painfully obvious that you are.

"The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears." - John Vance Cheney

Monday, May 17, 2010

Reclaiming the Rainbow

This week (which is also the first ever week of music awesomeness) is titled "Reclaiming the Rainbow". Yes, we've allowed you to prance around with it for a while, but the time has come to give the colory shit back. Not that we need it, it's just that it belongs to us. Plus, we might need it. And it actually isn't magic. Just broken light. Why, yes, you can break the light. Just like I can break your... well, let's not go there yet. Go get a hammer and start hitting the light. See what happens... See? Told you so. So yeah, this week's theme is random rainbowy shit.

The week begins with "Trumpet Monday", which features a song "Rainbow" by the Japanese ska-punk band Kemuri. Now get the fuck out of here and have a fantastic week! Listen to the song first! (-sigh-)

"One can enjoy a rainbow without necessarily forgetting the forces that made it" - Mark Twain